Tantrums to Testimony: What Motherhood is Teaching Me About Patience

Motherhood has a way of humbling you. I thought I knew what patience was before I had kids. I thought patience meant waiting in a long grocery line without sighing, or dealing with traffic without honking. But patience in motherhood? That’s a whole different kind of lesson.

It looks like a toddler screaming in the middle of Target. It looks like a newborn who refuses to sleep through the night. It looks like repeating yourself ten times just to get shoes on little feet.

And honestly? Sometimes it doesn’t feel holy. Sometimes it feels like I’m going to break.

But in those very moments—the tantrums, the meltdowns, the mess—I’ve realized that God is teaching me something deeper. Patience isn’t just about waiting. It’s about surrender.

“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” – Ephesians 4:2

When I read this verse as a mom, it hits differently. Bearing with one another in love means bearing with my kids when they’re overtired, cranky, or testing every boundary. It means bearing with myself when I fall short and snap in frustration. And the more I walk this journey, the more I see myself in my toddler.

Because if I’m being honest, I throw my own spiritual tantrums with God. I get impatient when prayers aren’t answered on my timeline. I argue when things don’t go my way. I sulk when life feels unfair. In so many ways, I am the toddler, stomping my feet before a God who knows better. And yet… He never reacts to me the way I sometimes react to my child.

“The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.” – Psalm 103:8

If God flew off the handle every time I got it wrong, I’d be crushed. But He doesn’t. He leans in with grace, again and again. He corrects me with love. He patiently teaches me, even when I have to relearn the same lesson for the hundredth time.

So I ask myself often: What if I responded to my toddler the way God responds to me?

That thought changes everything.

I don’t always get it right. Sometimes I react out of frustration, and it comes out sharper than I intended. But I’ve made a decision: I will never let pride keep me from apologizing to my child. If I overreact, I own it. I kneel down, look her in the eyes, and say, “I’m sorry. Mommy shouldn’t have spoken to you that way.”

Because children deserve that respect. They deserve to see what humility looks like. They deserve to know that “because I said so” is not always enough.

For me, “I’m the mom” is not a free pass. I want my daughter to understand the why behind the boundaries I set. I want her to know that certain things are a “no” not because I’m trying to control her, but because I want to protect her. Sometimes it’s about safety. Sometimes it’s simply because it isn’t the right time.

Now let me pause here for honesty: am I a glorified Instagram gentle parent? Absolutely not.

I do believe in discipline. While sometimes all my daughter needs is “the look” or a firm voice, other times she needs a time-out… and yes, sometimes even la chancleta. I stand by the fact that discipline has its place in parenting.

But I’m also learning that those methods are not always the appropriate approach. There are times when she doesn’t need fear or punishment—she needs guidance, grace, and my presence. I want to be a mom who teaches my child to respect boundaries but also feels safe enough to trust me with her emotions.

Because discipline without grace can harden a heart. Grace without discipline can create confusion. But together—when held in balance—they create a reflection of God’s love: firm, steady, but overflowing with compassion.

“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” – Ephesians 6:4

I grew up in a home where questioning rules wasn’t always allowed. Respect often meant silence. And while I honor the intentions behind it, I also know I want to do things differently.

I want my daughter to see discipline as love, not control. I want her to trust that when I say “no,” it comes from the same heart God has toward me—a heart that protects, guides, and always loves.

Motherhood is teaching me patience, yes, but it’s also teaching me grace. Grace for my child, grace for myself, and a deeper appreciation for the unending grace God extends to me. And maybe that’s the real testimony here: not that I get it right every time, but that God is reshaping me in the process. He’s using tantrums to teach me tenderness. He’s using interruptions to grow endurance. He’s using the most ordinary moments of motherhood to show me what extraordinary love really looks like.

So the next time my toddler is mid-meltdown in the grocery store aisle, I’ll take a deep breath and remind myself: This is not just a tantrum. This is training ground for my heart. This is a testimony in the making. Because patience in motherhood isn’t just about surviving the hard moments—it’s about mirroring the grace of a God who never loses patience with me.

xx

Santa Naisha